The Bible is a mine, not a museum. Don’t just come to look and see, but dig, explore and take home some treasure. – Jon Bloom, IHOPKC
Adam & Eve Abraham & Sarah David Eli The list goes on… The Bible is truly an inspiration and living, breathing collection of scripture to help us in our growth as people and as parents. It contains both ideological perfection and a collection of frail humanity. It is from the accounts of people, living in relationship, that we draw principles and “nuggets” to guide our lives. There are many examples of failed parents in the scriptures that we can learn from. Balswick offers important insight in our pursuit to become excellent parents: “Although our motive of discovering hard-and-fast rules for household life is understandable, a “problem arises here when we try to make the household codes into timeless rules which can be simply transposed across time to the present day without addition or subtraction.[1]” The scriptures give us many examples of parents who failed. It was what we learn from what they do and don’t do that help us. But more importantly, it is always to be interpreted inductively and metaphorically in our relationship to God. There are three Old Testament parents that stick out in my mind: Adam & Eve, Jacob & Leah. Adam & Eve We know the story well. We are even now experiencing the effects of their mistakes. Not only did Adam and Eve commit the original sin, they did very little to maintain a righteous posterity. As we read in the Genesis 4 account, Adam and Eve are now moving on, living a life under the curse. At the birth of Cain, Eve begins to give the glory to God by declaring her son was a gift from God. Her hope of salvation was eager at best. We see her ferverency for “incarnation” by her teaching of sacrifice and worship to their sons, Cain and Abel. However, we also see Adam’s chronic, sinful condition: failure to take ownership for his sin. The fruit of lack of perpetual righteousness and lack of discipline for bringing our faults unto the altar of the Lord take hold of Cain. Cain, being the first born of creation, carried the “first born” complex to always be the best. He was spoken over by his mother as “gift from God” but without his father’s example of modeling humility and seeking to be transformed from his old ways, Cain worshipped God from the flesh. When God disapproved of his sacrifice, Cain instead of taking ownership, confessing his sin and seeking to make changes to his attitude and behavior, he killed Abel. The first murder of human existence was due to a lack of commitment to the sanctification process. The takeaway from all this? We have sin in our lives that need more attention and tending to other than a one time after the sermon experience. We are in constant need of our spouse, our church family and quality time listening to the Holy Spirit to see what chronic, sinful conditions we are struggling with. Jacob & Leah Jacob, a grandson of a famous “Hall of Faith-er,” Abraham, had to deal with chronic sin of his own. The generational sin of Abraham’s decision to allow his wife (who lacked faith and wanted to force God’s plan in her own strength) to push him to commit a sexual sin that common to the cultural practices of the world, had a profound influence on not only his immediate life, but effect his own generation. Jacob’s own father, Isaac, was a weak character and father. He was lost in his own grief that his wife Rebekah felt the need to “pick up the slack.” She favored her son Jacob and used deception to force God’s plan. Jacob, having a weak example for a father and possessing only the skills of a manipulator, failed short with his dealings with Leah and Rachel. Jacob was tricked into marrying Leah but should have known better than to just use her and ignore her. Leah, naturally, would have felt victimized. I can only imagine the struggle to deal with a position of not being wanted nor preferred. Two different stories, same similar root problem… parents fail for lack of addressing sin in their lives. This problem can and will affect our children and breed a culture of generational sin. We need to deal with guilt, shame, condemnation, our insecurities and shortcomings area definite reality for being human. However, what is the greater definite is the grace and mercy of God. Moving towards Godly Parenting Prayer is not on option, it’s a must. Our communication with our heavenly Father and source of life must be constant and the practice nurtured. We need to constantly search ourselves and seek out barriers within us that prevent our vital communion with our Lord. Partnership is also a very important aspect of our parenting. Our spouse is a great resource to us for prayer, support and feedback. Gaining skills in confronting one another in a godly way will help us see an honest picture of ourselves. Many times in effort to move forward in life, we have a tendency to gloss over our shortcomings. Our shortcomings have a way, however, to keep us grounded, authentic and in touch with reality. It is our tendency to hide like Adam when we struggle with sin or chronic character flaws but it is our need for salvation that we need to run to God and allow those sensitive realities be groomed by the life giving flow of the Holy Spirit. [1] Balswick, J. O., & Balswick, J. K. (2007). The family: A Christian perspective on the contemporary home. Grand Rapids, Mich: Baker Academic.
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